You're So Vain.....

.....You probably think this post is about you. Don't you?  It's probably not.  Those who this is about are two specific people who will remain nameless for obvious reasons.  If you think it is you and you did ALL these things; it is about you.  If you did some of these things, shame on you, but this post is NOT about you.  Maybe next time. 

I met this mother and daughter at my daughter's volleyball practice.  Because we live relatively close I thought it would be a good idea if we car pooled.  Good in theory, bad in practice.  She'd drive her van one day and ours the next time with Andrea driving home for the practice.

We couldn't do anything right (correctly) from the first time we took our van. Andrea hadn't backed our van out yet so she could park in the driveway.  She didn't want to park on the street because someone might come down that hill and hit her van.  She had a point on that but what's the hurry?  It was only 8:15 and we had until 10:00 to go thirty-five miles.

Andrea's not knowing the freeways, or where she is most of the time makes Andrea Special according to this woman and her daughter.  After all her daughter knows these things.  My saying kids don't learn these things because we take them everywhere is just an excuse to let the mom tell it.  Her daughter knows these things and she's not exceptional.  She can't think outside the box because who is it that would have taught Andrea these things?  I get onto Andrea for not paying attention to her surroundings because I was taught to know where you are.  But it's not up to random people to judge her for being out of it in the georgaphy department.

How many of you have gone to a new walmart?  Do you remember the traffic a new Walmart generates?  My neighbor across the street was brave enough to ride with Andrea to the new Walmart at night.  To me it looked like a sea of headlights and break lights.  Andrea decides to scare me some more by making a left turn in all this and heading for a McDonald's drive threw.  She did it.  I was on pens and needles, but that's my job.  When I told the carpool mom about this she said, "Is being scared a hobby for you"?  No anybody who knows me would never ask such a question.  People who know me accuse me of being too brave or too independent. 

This is the same woman I mentioned in  Tribute to ASB Teachers from the 70's. (In this Month's edition)

I told the group how we had played a version of volleyball, that they probably wouldn't call volleyball, at ASB.  I explained how the ball could stay on a side as long as it didn't go out of bounds, get hit into or under the net, or stop bouncing.  I told how each player was allowed a certain number of bounces depending on how well they could see.  All the parents thought this was interesting except one.  The one that didn't find this interesting wasn't a club mom; it was the mom of a player who had never played.  "That must have been some neighborhood thing," she sneered.  I reminded her that I had already said they probably wouldn't call it volleyball.

The team's first scrimmage was September 16th.  My neighbor from farther up the road wanted to go.  She had played on her high school's volleyball team back in the day.  Since we'd be going in the other van I told My neighbor I'd find out if it was alright.  Talk about unsociable; I was surprised.  After I introduced everybody and they said something like nice to meet you that was it.  Would my neighbor liked to gotten to know the people she was riding with?  Who Knows.  Our carpool driver put in a CD, turns it up loud, and starts singing; all the way to Marietta.  

Sprayberry High School is still undefeated.  We lost the matches but they didn't skunk us.  Frist match 15 to 25 Sprayberry.  Second match 24 to 25 Sprayberry. 

On the way back the driver asked Andrea if she was going to drive back from Marietta on Thursday?  Andrea said she wasn't going to drive back.  She said she didn't want to.  I was both surprised and not surprised.  Andrea loves to drive but she already has three different people telling her three different things when she drives.  I can definitely understand not wanting a fourth. 

"You can't hack it."  She tells Andrea.

"I just don't want to drive."  Andrea replies.

Digression.  We've already been told and shown how her daughter, age thirteen can already drive.  She had her daughter back their van out of our driveway when we got back the first time we took our van. 

When it's time to drive our van I get some CDs for entertainment.  They didn't like that at all.  The daughter was making faces because she didn't like the music.  The mother had the audacity to say, "I thought the driver got to choose the music."  I acted like I didn't hear her.  The driver may usually get to choose the music because...........IT IS USUALLY THEIR VEHICLE.  When I ride in somebody's car, truck, van, etc and they have music or the radio on I keep my mouth shut about it.  It doesn't matter one whit if I like the genre, it's their vehicle, they choose. 

How did we handle the radio situation when Beazle sent some church members to get us from Georgia in her car and bring us to Arkansas?  The driver changed the station until somebody, I don't remember who, said, "Leave it there."  It stayed there until that person said, "Find something else."  And so it went. 

So Andrea decides she wants to drive back after all.  Andrea tells the mom that she, Andrea, will need directing, because she doesn't know the way back.  No response but we head out.  "You should have got in the right lane to get on 75."  Andrea keeps driving and we end up in the middle of some town.  "I thought you saw that sign for 75 over there, but I guess you didn't."  Andrea keeps driving, sees a sign, presumably for 75,  and asks, "Do I want Marietta or Atlanta?"  No response from the mother.  Snide response from the daughter, "Marietta is , N o r t h of us."  True, this is something Andrea should know but this is not the time for a geography lesson.   

I deliberately keep my cool.  I'm upset with Andrea for not using the GPS on her phone from the beginning.  I'm upset with the daughter for opening her mouth with unhelpful info.  I'm really upset with the mother for sitting there mute like a bump on a log.  At the next stop light I tell Andrea to get her phone out and use the GPS. 

When Andrea starts getting directions from the GPS the mother decides to talk.  Once she said somethink like get in the right lane so you can get off at the next exit.  By the time she finished saying it the exit was there.  Andrea did the right thing in my opinion and kept driving.  The GPS hadn't told her to get off, and if it had it would have given more time.  She pulls this again but this time Andrea had time to make the exit.  When we're right at the exit she tells Andrea to,"Stay on 285."  (Don't ask me when 75 became 285 or when she changed highways.)  Andrea stays on the exit ramp.  Again she says, "Stay on 285."  Were there two ways to get back on 285?  Andrea made a left, drove a little bit and merged back on.  The mom said Andrea should have gone right but, "It's your gas." 

I ask where are we?  I like to know such things.  They make fun of Andrea because she doesn't know where she is most of the time but don't answer me when I ask.  Andrea's unhelpful, but existent reply is mile marker such and such.  Everybody else is quiet as mice.  I ask another question.  What mile marker do we need to get to?  Andrea doesn't know and no answer from the peanut gallery. 

So we keep driving along in silence.  Out of nowhere the daughter snaps, "Why did you go by the Covington Highway exit?  We always get off on the Covington Highway exit."  The mother remained mute; the GPS was quiet.  Where is a gag and duct tape when you need it?  I was fed up, I was going to take Andrea's side unless she came out with something totally off the wall.  I asked Andrea why she didn't take the Covington Highway exit.  She could have responded with all kinds of good answers, and she did.  "I'm going to get off at the Glenwood Exit."  Andrea said.  I back her up by saying, "That is the exit we take when we go places with Tammy and them."  She could have also said the GPS didn't tell me to get off there.  The Covington Highway exit puts you off right on Covington Highway and you drive on city streets longer.  You stay on the freeway longer if you take the Glenwood exit and have to turn off Glenwood onto Covington Highway.  Six of one, half a dozen of the other.

How can people be such know it alls and be so rigid?  When you know everything shouldn't you know there's more than one way to skin a cat and all roads lead to Rome?  It was like they were hoping Andrea would fail and they were bent on helping her fail.  If Andrea would have given up or got and stayed lost they would have had something to gloat about.  When she exercised some self help with the GPS they decided to open their mouths and give bogus directions.

When we got home they get out of the van.  They don't say, bye, have a nice day, kiss my butt, nothing.  They just got in their van and left.

I told Andrea I thought she did a good job.  I told her how proud I was of her for not changing lanes when she didn't know if it was safe, and for staying calm under such  stressful  conditions.  I told her she should have had her GPS ready from the beginning.  If she had, we would have avoided the trip through that town. 

The whole episode kept bugging me.  I called Tammy to see if she was home; I needed to vent.  I thought she'd tell me I shouldn't let all this bother me.  Like a good friend and neighbor she took my side.  We agreed that the daughter acted like that because she'd heard her mother talking.  I told Tammy that is why I came to her house.  I didn't want Andrea to hear me down grading those people and get an attitude in front of them.  Tammy said I probably wouldn't hear from them again after that.  I thought she was right.

Later the same day, I get a call from the mother, "I forgot to say goodbye this afternoon.  I was in such a hurry to get to my next appointment, I forgot to say goodbye.  I'll see you Tuesday."  I said ok.  I thought to myself she probably went to the service station to fill up her van and got reminded of how expensive it is to drive alone twice a week. 

I'm not sure what I'm going to do.  Tammy is willing to drive but I'm not found of fueling my van for all the trips either.  I'm going to make a point to get phone numbers for more of the team members who live close. 

In my opinion they think they're better than Andrea and me; possibly other people as well.  At volleyball practice the mother can't seem to understand why her daughter doesn't play as well as the best players.  It's a no brainer; those girls have been in volleyball clubs, teams, and camps for at least three years.  Who'd pay for all that if those girls had no potential?  This woman's daughter just started playing Volleyball on September 3rd.  Does she really have to be told there's no way her daughter is going to be anywhere near as good a player as the girls with at least three years of training under their belts>