Saturday, July 13, 2013

In My Day

Andrea and I were reading Because I Said So by a good book about the science or bunk behind old wives tales.  I had to stop the book and comment when we got to the part about a child being lost in a national park in Utah.  The child had been lost for more than a day, tired, scraped up, and dehydrated.  Rescuers learned the child had done things he was told to do, well almost.  He stayed on the trail; except when he saw other people.  Then he'd leave the trail and hide.  The child didn't approach these people because they were "strangers".  What are younger parents teaching their children?  When does the insulation come off? 

Things we see on old TV shows as normal were normal in real life.  Kids spent much of their free time unsupervised.  We walked to friend's houses and played games passed down from who know where; tag, red rover, hide and seek, jump rope games, kick ball.  If things got routy a parent stuck his or head out the door and said, "Play fair."  Grown folks didn't make a Federal case out of kids minor disputes.  I remember on the first season on The Waltons one of the parents asked the older kids, "Where"s Elizabeth?" The older kids answered, "She went up the road."  No berating the older kids for leting her go.  No stressing over the fact she had gone. 

I told Andrea about her Sister Merritt's kindergarten orientation in the early 1990's.  I don't remember the exact reason but I remember the reason was more logistical than fearful.  The principal said not to let our kindergarteners ride their bakes to school because there weren't enough bike racks or something like that.  First graders on up can ride bikes to school but please not the kindergarteners. 

I rode the Trailways bus home from school every Friday my whole blind school career.  Nobody thought anything about it back then.  Someone drove us to the bus station; I don't think they even waited with us.  We listened for our bus to be called, proceeded to the correct door, gave the driver our ticket, and boarded the bus.  I don't think any parents would do that with their high schoolers, let along kindergarteners now days.  I wouldn't with little ones for sure and probably not Andrea but for many reasons. 

I think I've written about fourth graders and above being allowed to roam the state fair unsupervised.  Nobody got lost, hurt, or abducted.  Everyone returned to the designated spot for lunch and when it was time to leave.  Again, this wouldn't happen today with children so young. 

When did, "Don't take candy from strangers," become, "Don't talk to strangers"?  As a little kid I remember being told the former.  As a parent I don't remember telling my children either but they picked but not talking to strangers somewhere.  Andea doesn't even want to go up to someone to ask directions. 

I don't know how Andrea, and I guess others her age, can be so uninterested in their surroundings.  Even when we're on a bus rout we've never been on, Andrea will read a book.  I study the map before the trip to get an idea where it goes.  If I want to know what businesses we're passing I have to ask her.  Then she can't remember how to get there again.  I had to refresh her memory on how to get to Piedmont Park, somewhere we've been several times.  I think our insulating these kids robs them of skills we picked up through osmosis.  We learned to pay attention, to ask questions, to find our way.  Take away their phones and I wonder how many of them could find their way to anything a mile away.

Andrea would like to visit Pine Bluff on the Bus.  Will I let her?  No way!  Number one, her looks and there are too many weirdos on Greyhound buses.  Number two, she doesn't pay attention to her surroundings.  There's no telling where she may get off or which bus she may board.  Number three, she may not even ask a ticket agent for instructions. and last but not least I think they have an age limit of 17.  If I could afford plane fare I'd send her that way.  Fewer weirdos, tighter controls so she's not going to get on the wrong plane or transfer at the wrong city. 

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