How Young I Was

             

         

                                                     

 

        

                                             Beazle used to say I started to school at the Arkansas School for the blind 22 days before I     turnedfiv        e.  Actually it was 21 days before.  I know because back then school started the day after Labor Day at ASB and most other places as well.  Mom must have counted the day I wen

 

 

 

t along with my birthday.  Like the cruse lines call a cruse starting on Friday and ending on Sunday a three day cruise.  So on September 7, 1965 I went away to school; coming home most weekends, vacations, and summers.

"You may ask, "Why are you bringing this up now?"  Well, two of my grown children made me think of this.  My oldest made a post on Facebook about Black History Month and my youngest asked in a comment, wasn't Mom  in one of the first classes to attend ASB after integration?  Yes I was.  We first toured the Blind school             for Black students thinking I'd be going there.  Sometime during the summer the powers that be decided to integrate the schools and everybody went to the school on Markham.

My oldest grandchild will be turning five soon.  I will be thinking about him 21 days before his fifth birthday.   I wonder how my parents brought themselves to make such a dramatic decision for their young child.  I am so grateful they did  

 

I rode a Continental Trailways (a competitor of Greyhound) bus home every Friday.  Sometimes I also took the bus back to Little Rock on Sundays, sometimes Mom drove me.  You may shutter to think of such a thing now, but it was a matter of course back then for children of all ages to travel alone by bus.  Someone from school would take us to the bus station on Friday afternoon and buy our tickets.  That person gave us our ticket and left.  It was our responsibility to listen for the announcements, keep up with our ticket, and board the bus.  Mom met me at the other end in Pine Bluff.  When I took the bus back on Sunday, I'd sometimes have to ask the ticket agent to call the school to have someone come pick me up.  Usually there'd be older students returning and they'd ask the ticket agent to call.

I can't imagine my grandson doing these things at his present age.  Take away the dangers children face             now and I still can't imagine him being allowed to do things like that even if adults thought he could.        b.

    

                            

Coming Out as An Athiest

Originally I planned to come out after the first of the year but a Facebook copy and paste message got me started.  It was one of those posts that say they'd rather believe in God than to find out later they were wrong.  I'm not one to live my entire known life in fear of the unknown life to come.  I reluctantly came to the conclusion God did not exist after many years.  I first settled for agnostic status because I didn't want to make the leap to atheist.

Since a young age, I knew I didn't have the deep seated conviction of God and Jesus.  I saw people around me rely on them for almost everything in their lives.  Some believed in a loving God while others saw God as vengeful and judgemental.  I didn't relate to either.  I knew I didn't have whatever these people had that caused them to believe.

Mom and Dad were, for the most part, believers and went to various churches on a sporadic basis.  Dad would go to other churches but return to the Church of God in Christ.  He said, "I don't feel like I've been to church after attending a Baptist church."  The Church of God in Christ is a lively congregation with drums, loud music, clapping, and people 'getting happy'.  We studied with the Jehovah Witnesses, Seventh Day Adventist, and visited nearby Baptist churches.  When I stayed at school on the weekends I visited a Catholic church, other Baptist churches, and I think a Methodist church.  None of these churches had a message that spoke to me. 

I guess my sister and I being born legally blind may have bothered Mom more than she let on.  One day she took us to a faith healer who had an office somewhere.  She said to tell people we went to the eye doctor.  I don't remember if he prayed for my sister and me together or separately.  He put either one or both hands over my eyes and made what I considered even then stupid pronouncements.  He said there was nothing wrong with my/our eyes.  He said we needed to rest them because we'd been "Playing too much baseball".  I didn't know how much baseball was too much, but I knew I hadn't been playing any.  At that point we didn't play kickball or fist-ball in P.E. yet.  I didn't even watch ballgame of any kind on TV. 

I have always been a logical person; later I'd add science to help me reach a conclusion about things.  As a youngster I'd ask my great grandmother for coffee when she made some for herself.  "Coffee make you black," she reply.  This didn't make any since.  She was old, but she had light skin.  Besides that, I was already darker than she was.

Sunday school was always a conundrum for me.  The teacher would read a passage from the bible and ask, ''what did Jesus mean when he said that?"  It was always a riddle to me and when someone else answered with the correct answer, I still was confused.  The one that comes to mind is, "You can't put new wine in old bottles."  Many years were to go by before I got a satisfactory answer to this one. 

I didn't like getting up, getting ready, and going to church just to be yelled at.  After surviving a perplexing Sunday School lesson the minister would preach a long, drawn out, fiery sermon about Revelations, The Second Coming, Judgement Day, or burning in Hell.  I couldn't be frightened into belief.  At baptisms I'd wonder what was said to move these people to be baptized.

Mom taught us The Lord's Prayer and we always said a blessing on the food.  The food was blessed at school until it was changed to a moment of silence.  One houseparent gave us an award when we memorized The Twenty-third Psalm and John 3:16.  I can still recite them.

My first memory of not being able to trust God came when I was in the third grade.  Every morning the teacher would read a Bible story.  She read about Noah's ark and the flood.  The end of the story stated how God put a rainbow in the sky as a promise not to destroy the world by flood again.  Shortly thereafter we had a substitute teacher and she read the same Noah's ark story.  I came to the conclusion that God doesn't keep his promises.  Logically I know she read the wrong story, but my conclusion stuck with me.

I'd seen people pray for the sick, pray to find something they lost, say Jesus never failed, or help me Jesus.  If the sick person had a cold, flu, or broken bone, they got better.  If the sick person was elderly, it was hit or miss.  People usually found what they lost, and I didn't see the help they asked for.  Others continued to believe; I continued to wonder if I ever would.

My sister got baptized when she was thirteen and I was nineteen or twenty.  I felt I was missing something because I still hadn't felt the need to be baptized or join a church.

the Christmas after I moved into my own apartment, Dad gave me a family Bible.  He said I'd be embarrassed if somebody came to my place and wanted to look up something in the Bible and I didn't have one.  I wrote the names in the proper places and put it away.  There it stayed for about two years.

I'll give a bare bones account of my conversion to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day saints.  I've given a more detailed account before.  I wasn't looking for religion or a church when the missionaries came to my door.  I had time to listen to them if they were finished before the guiding Light came on.  They said they would be, and they were.  I let them come back same time next week because I had time then and they were just a couple years younger than I was.  I went to an open house at the church and met a lot of nice people.  the three degrees of glory made more sense to me than just Heaven or Hell.  the lifestyle was appealing because I wasn't a party girl anyway.  I could accept extra scriptures because Dad bought a large print Catholic Bible which had the book of Macabees and another book or two in it.  Also the Jehovah's Witnesses had a Bible.  Continuing revolations also made since to me.  why would God talk so much back then and be silent now?  I was a psychology major and had already studied abnormal psych so I could logically explain Joseph Smith's visions.

I knew I didn't have the deep belief and personal witness other people do when they decide to be baptized.  I knew I believed as much as I was capable of believing.  I knew at twenty-two I should belong to a church.

For the most part between my baptism in 1983 and this year I've been a good Mormon.  There were ups and downs but, on the whole, good.  I never developed a strong testimony of any of the principles of the gospel.  I never felt a burning in my bosom, and I never thought the Prophet knew more about running my life than I did.  My LDS friends would say God is testing me.  I say why would God give me a test he knows I'll flunk?

I started to be concerned about my eyesight in 2007.  I saw the eye doctor and he wanted to monitor my vision before he said it was glaucoma for sure.  I started praying.  first, that it wasn't glaucoma, and also that whatever it was wouldn't get worse.  It got worse, and I continued to pray.  I was finally diagnosed with glaucoma in September of 2011.  I kept praying my sight would stabelize.  It got to the the point where I wouldn't go to a new place alone.  After I'd been there once, I had no quams about going alone.

I went from one eyedrop at night to a full schedule of drops throughout the day.  My sight got worse, I continued to pray.  You get the picture.

I bought a white cane when it was time to take Andrea to college.  I was flying back and didn't dare brave the airports without assistance.  I cried in the visibility Store the day I bought the cane.

After I got home from taking Andrea to school my sight went on a slippery slope.  Shopping became an almost impossible chore.  A lady from church offered to take me shopping.  I missed my stop on MARTA a few times and started using paratransit exclusively.  It got to where I didn't dare fry chicken anymore.  I enlarged my smartphone text and started using my CC TV to read mail.

By the time Andrea came home for Christmas I could no longer hide how bad my sight had become.  Before she left in August I'd thought about asking her to stay.  I couldn't do that because I knew how much it meant to her to go away to college and I wanted her to go at the same time.  I had taken a few Christmas photos for the stock agencies.  There weren't nearly as many or as varied as usual but I knew these were my last stock photo submissions.  I did set up the camera to record Andrea's homecoming.  It took far too long to set up.

I bought myself an Apple TV and a tablet for Christmas.  The Apple device was too much of a struggle to use so it went back.

Andrea and her then boyfriend, Brett, took the pictures Christmas morning.  That was the first time I could remember not taking pictures.  I had Andrea change my monitor to 600 by 800 so the print would automatically be larger.  This helped somewhat but less information was on the screen horizontally so scrolling back and forth was a real pain.

One day, I lost it.  I ran upstairs fussing and yelling about something I was having trouble with.  Andrea said something about maybe it's time for me to move to South Dakota near her.

I don't know when I stopped praying.  I know I stopped because it wasn't doing me any good.  My prayers were to stabilize, not restore my sight.  If there was a god he wouldn't or couldn't.  I couldn't bring myself to say there is no God yet.  I was so frustrated.  I'd been a photographer all my life.  I'd been an excellent computer user since 2000, why take the only things I have going for me away?  I hadn't stolen as much as a candy bar; sure, I'm judgemental, I help people when I can, and I can't even get my sight stabelized.  Also a friend's cancer had come back.  She was a good person, she fought the good fight, she didn't make it through the second fight.  How could god let her cancer come back?  I decided I was agnostic just in case.

I didn't pray about it; I decided to take Andrea up on her offer.  We looked for apartments in her South Dakota town.  there was an ad for a newly constructed townhouse development.  I called and was told they were filling up fast.  I got an application to start the process.  I called the top real estate agency in Metro Atlanta and put my house on the market.  I got an offer after four days.  No prayers on my part.  Closing was set for Feburary 29.  The townhouse people said a unit would be available the first week in March.  After bluffing and blustering my way through a delayed closing, I flew to Sioux Falls on March 9th and signed my lease on March 10th.

Before I moved and after Andrea went back my sight got even worse.  I had to abandon online bill pay and write checks using the CC TV.  It took forever to read mail even with the CC TV.  I'd heave a sigh of relief when there was only junk mail and almost jump for joy when the mailbox was empty.  Sometimes the lights would be on but they didn't illuminate; the room would still be dark with the light bulb bright.  the sky lost it's color, no more distinguishing between blue skies and gray skies.  I slept later because the outside light didn't light up my room very much anymore.

My first Sunday in Sunday School at my new Branch in South Dakota I found myself speaking out.  The teacher ask why we thought people didn't pray.  I had a lot to say as you can guess.  Later, a lady said something about having an illness or losing a child so we could learn something from it.  I asked what are we supposed to learn if nobody tells us.  And as a Mormon crutch, being tested was brought up.  I asked why test somebody who has little or no faith to begin with.  After class the teacher said I took the discussion in a whole new direction.

Now I am down to light perception and that light is getting darker.  Why would a loving god let this happen to me?  Didn't the vengeful God get enough vengence when he made me legally blind since birth?  And not to mention all the other people who suffer from terrible things due to no fault of their own?

My uncle was diagnosed with stage four bone cancer.  He was very sick, in the hospital, and not expected to live.  Miraculuiously he was cured.  He is now back home living a normal life.  Some say God cured him.  I think he was misdiagnosed.  If God cured him, how does God decide who to cure and who to leave uncured?

Don't tell me to read the bible.  Don't tell me to have more faith, don't tell me to join another church.  My life has shown me through fifty-six years on this earth that something as random as prayer and apparently, god, can't be relied upon. 

Thoughts on the Oklahoma Fraternity Scandal

The fact that these fraternity members were chanting and singing about lynching "niggers" and keeping Black students out of their fraternity didn't shock me.  They thought themselves to be among like-minded compatriots; free to express themselves freely.  What did surprise me was my friends reactions.  I figured my friends would have the same outlook as I do.  My reaction was the fraternity members had been foolish in expressing themselves in such a way in a place where they couldn't see what everybody was doing.  Somebody had recorded them and sent the video to the media.  In this age of smartphones and instant internet, how could they let themselves be cought saying things like that?

Two friends I grew up with, and went to the school for the blind with had vastly different reactions than each other.  They were discussing it on Facebook along with others.  One friend is a Black man who has lived much of his adult life up north and the other a White woman who lived in the same state all her life.  My Black friend couldn't believe people still had attitudes like this toward Black people, or people of other races for that matter, in this day and age.  The idea that people with this mindset could be found in sufficient quantity to be confortable enough to express themselves seemed impossible to him.  My White friend considers this a freedom of expression issue and the students should be left alone.

For instances like this is one reason I'm not in favor of political correctness.  It glosses over and sugar coats peoples true feelings.  I believe we should know how we stand in the hearts of those we spend time, effort, and money with.  How many Black students have pledged this fraternity, gotten in, and payed dues in the past?  If they had know the true feelings of a great number of the members these students could have pledged another fraternity.  My dad used to say, "I'm not going to beg them to take my money," when an establishment wasn't up to par.  To me this sentiment goes for where I spend my time and money.  In this politically correct ere we don't know who likes us and who dispises us.  We have to pretend to be okay with issues and /or groups we disagree with.

When I'm with family and Black neighbors sometimes the conversation rolls around to things race related.  Lots of my friends, and neighbors say how White people won't let Black people get anywhere, or how they'll only let us get so far.  If somebody says he or she was treated unfairly somebody will ask if the person who did them wrong was Black or White.  If the person they think did them wrong was Black, that Black person is just trying to look good in front of White folks for some reason or is brown nosing.  If the person was White he or she is a racists.  The wrong does can't just be a terrible person or the person thought done wrong just mistaken.

If talk like this goes on in the Black community about Whites it stands to reason talk about Whites discontent about Blacks goes on to.  Talk radio is as close as I can get to it because of political correctness.  If they express their discontent or don't understand our point of view they're labeled racist.

By listening to talk radio it seems like Whites wish Blacks would stop referring to slavery.  After all slavery has been over for a hundred and fifty years.  When does it stop?  Does it matter none of the former slaves or slave owners are still alive?  Does it matter that few of us have stories of these long ago ancestors?  Slavery is part of our history and there is nothing we can do to change it now.   Because it happened is no reason to use it as a crutch for today.  My great grandmother was born in 1885 so my great great grandmother may or may not have been a slave.  I don't think she was because my great grandmother never mentioned her mother being a slave.   The Jews say, "Never forget," when it comes to the Holocaust.  Will they be told to get over it by people in 2100?  Whould they?  They shouldn't forget, neither should they use it as a crutch. 

I Black/White standards I am not prejudiced. Both my husbands were white and if I ever get another he'll most like be White too.  I grew up in both worlds so to speak and that is my choice and I make no apoligies.  But I think I am prejudiced and again I make no apologies.

Back in the 2000's when churches and such were sending things for Iraqi children I thought this was ridiculous.  Iraqi children grow into Iraqi adults.  I remember once our church was having the kids get packages ready and make homemade dolls to send to Iraqi Children.  I told them flat out the my kids wouldn't be there.     

If my daughters brought home a Muslim or Middle Easterner all hell would break loose.  I don't care if he is a medical exchange student, a nationalized citizen, or born and bred here in the USA by fourth generation American parents.  With 9-11, Isis, and the Taliban, there's no was I'd just be political correct and say people are people.  I'd fuss and fume and do everything I humanly could to break them up.  

A lady in one of the Facebook groups I belong to think education is the key to tolerance.  She thinks young children should have a class in tolerance of all kinds of different people.  Don't get me started on how much the schools expect little kids to study already.  Another subject is too much, especially a politically correct class.  I can think of several topics in such a class that would cause me to keep my kids home. 

I believe interaction brings about tolerance and understanding, not education.  Yes, you could require me to take a class to learn about all kinds of different people and lifestyles.  I could learn the material and pass the test.  Have I been enlightened?  If you ask me If I believe in gay marriage I'd say no.  In principle I'm against it.  I believe marriage should be between people of the opposite sex.  On the other hand if you ask me if somebody I know should marry another person of the same sex I'd say yes because I want them to be happy.  Did I go out of my way to eat a Chick Fil A during their bru ha ha about the owner's beliefs about gay marriage?  Yes because we all have the right to believe what we choose to believe.

As the old saying goes, "Him convinced against his will, is of the same opinion still".

The End of an Era

Beazle's House

yesterday I was emotional because Beazle left her home of almost forty-four years to move in with my sister. Constance and I asked Mom about moving in with one of us or moving into a retirement community after her stroke in 2010. Mom always said she wanted to stay in her own home. I think she changed her mind last May, after my oldest daughter's wedding. Mom went to visit with Constance and Maria for a week or so in Louisville, Kentucky. Constance said Mom really liked it there. After that talk about moving started.

Everybody

 

 Next Constance and Maria bought a larger place and things were set in motion for Mom's move. We had what I call our last hurrah at Mom's house.Everybody came for Thanksgiving. We all had a good time. Mom put her house on the market just after Christmas and the ball was rolling. Andrea and I came to help get the house cleared out and took better pictures for realtor.com. I won't go into all the details and frustrations of getting the house listed and re-listed, suffice it to say, there are some lazy real estate agents out there and I don't know how they survive alongside the go getters.

We all figured Mom's house would be easier to sell if it was empty so moving date was moved up. Now it has come and gone. The movers came yesterday and Mom Constance, and Maria headed out after the movers left. I was sad most of yesterday. It would have been sadder but I had some personal matters to attend to with my youngest daughter. I will post my journal entry for yesterday....

 I'm already emotional today. Later this afternoon the movers come and Mom, Constance, and Maria head for Louisville. It's hard to wrap my brain around the fact the Mom won't be "at home" in a few short hours. I'm really not ready for this.

I remember when Mom and Dad bought this house. It was brand new, in and not yet finished subdivision. I was ten years old. Mom and I went to clean the house and polish the cabinets and doors with red oil when she got off work in the evenings. It looked so big as we wandered through the empty rooms.

Then on June 15, 1971 Dad decided to surprise Mom by moving us there while she was at work. And now, it’s changing again…… 

I awoke early this morning thinking about Beazle's moving. I tried to imagine the house empty. I remembered little things that happened over the years. I couldn't imagine it empty; there would always be some item of furniture in every room. I even wondered what the house thinks being empty after all these years, does it miss us? I'm not holding up well and I wonder how Beazle is doing. She says she's not sad and Constance confirms it. I'm the only one who seems to be sad and the only one who thinks Beazle will be sad. I know when I left home or moved some place new I was excited. I was getting ready to experience something new. It was the same for Merritt and Holiday and I'm looking forward to Andrea going off to college. These are the things that should happen to young adults. They pack up a move off. They leave the articles of childhood behind at home. They may or may not come back to claim some of them.

Beazles Malibu

But with Mom it is so final. She sold or gave away a lot of her possessions. She was able to sell her car back to the dealership for a good price, surprise, surprise. 
We put piles and piles of accumulated stuff on the curb for the garbage man or passers by to pick up. It was poignant because I could remember when this stuff was new. Seeing half a lifetime disposed of in this way was so sad.

Why is this different from when a young person moves? To me a younger person is looking forward while an older person is sizing down due to real or perceived necessity. What she takes needs to fit into someone else's space. Her things will be mixed in with or separated from other peoples things. It's not a visit; she can't go back home in a week or two. I'm trying to see the similarities between a young person moving out of the house or moving to another location for personal or professional reasons and an older person moving out of their home of many years to move in with relatives or some retirement living facilities.

I tell myself it would be nice to sell this house and buy a condo. I look at that as just a lifestyle choice. But when I think of Mom giving up her house to live with my sister it makes me sad. In a condo I'll be surrounded with all my stuff that I decide to bring. I'll have the freedom from yard work and major repairs. With Mom living with Constance and Maria, she'll have some of her stuff in somebody else's house. Even though she lives there, and I'm sure she's welcome, is she truly at home? The anwser for Constance and Maria I really think is yes. To Mom, I hope the answer is yes. My emotions say no. Emotions aren't based on facts, they're just based on how I think I'd feel if I lived in somebody else's house with few of my things with me.

As for this blog, I don't know. I started it to celebrate Beazle and her awesome quirkiness. She is still awesome and quirky so I should continue. On the other hand, this is my first entry in a long time. I do enjoy writing it when I sit down to do so. I get discouraged when I see the number of "Likes" on Facebook and the number of reads. I don't know what I'm doing wrong but it's something. A Facebook friend started a page about her new business earlier this month. Basically she is announcing the upcoming launch of her business. Last time I checked she had 301 likes. My pages have been up for years and none have even a hundred likes.

A Post with no Name

As you read this issue of The Beazler everything may seem backward.  I couldn't find a way to reorder the posts once I finished them and it felt strange to write them in reverse order.  Luckily you can read them in whatever order suits your fancy. 

I've been telling myself I need to write on the blog put I kept putting it off.  Today seemed like a good time because things have come together in a way.  I guess I can call this the USD issue, I think I will.  All the entries have something to do with the University of South Dakota. 

Blind as Eye Look Photography (that's me) took Andrea's senior pictures earlier this month.  We went to Stately Oakes Plantation the reported inspiration for Tara in Margaret Mitchell's Gone with the Wind.  We enjoyed turing the house and seeing the grounds. Here is a link to the Smugmug gallery. http://www.blindaseyelook.com/Portraits/Andreas-Senior-Pictures/  Those of us in the Atlanta area email blindaseyelook@live.com if you'd like portraits taken.

As soon as I knew Andrea had been accepted to USD I made a master list.  Things to do before she leaves, financing ideas, lists of what to take, what she already has, and the costs there of, both estimated and actual.  I know, I'm anal retentive, detail oriented, and probably OCD.  I remind you; I planned and executed our move from Arkansas to Georgia all by myself and had no, count them ZERO, snafu, or is it snafus? When August the something rolls around next year I will have done all I can to make it happen.  And if it happens I bet it will be smooth. 

Our candy bar sales started out slowly.  We got our candy the same time as the elementary schools around here got theirs.  I won't lie; I was perturbed.  I'll tell you why.  The last time I say a school selling candy bars you could buy directly from the kids was back when Holiday was in the sixth grade.  That would have been at least ten years ago.  Until this year the kids have been taking orders and delivering months later.  The good thing is we plan to sell until it gets too hot next Spring. 

It is so nice be be able to get up and go when we please.  Andrea's having her driver's license has been wonderful.  We don't go as much as I expected because of gas prices this summer but it has been nice. 

Hopefully I will stay on the once a month schedule for The Beazler.

Online Scholarship Search Frustration

"Has anyone won a scholarship offered through Fastweb?"  I saw asked somewhere online.  I don't know but we went through the process.  We answered all their profile questions and VIOLA! seven pages of "matches" were found.  I was feeling elated.  By the time I finished looking at page seven I was feeling just pretty good.  Some of Andrea's "matches" we for graduate students, law students, students attending a particular school, employees of the XYZ company, or some other criteria not listed on her profile.  Now throw out the ones that say sighn up with us for a chance to win..., take a photo or make a video and get likes, and you're down to the ones that can be tried for.  Because I like to start early I found may sites with last years information still posted.  That is gradually changing.

I asked my oldest daughter if she knew of any good sites to check other than Fastweb.  She said Fastweb was the best one.  Doing more research made me a believer.  Google has many entries for scholarship searches; most of them crap.  Some send spam, others call you milliseconds after you click on the submit button for more information, and I even found one that wanted money; in this day and age.

How many of you have hear about scholarships for all kinds of weird categories?  Me too.   We must not be weird enough.  I thought surly I'd find scholarships that fit more of our strange categories in some way.  Where are the scholarships for children who lost a parent, children of left-handed, legally blind photographers, Children who volunteered in the Bishop's Storehouse but aren't attending BYU, children who are the go to person in the neighborhood when someone has some IKEA to be assembled, person who got all her points for parallel parking on the road test, drove across country five days after getting her license, last and definately least had five different hair colors in less than a year.  Tongue and cheek, sure, but they do advertize scholarships for odd ball things.  We only have homeschooled biracial student to help stand out in the crowd. 

Andrea will probably want to make mush out of me after the ACT.  Part of English time and Fridays will be devoted to a master essay.  When it is finished she can copy and paste the relevent parts into these scholarship applications we find on Fastweb. 

Please keep your eyes and ears open for scholarship offerings out there.  I hope we can make this happen. 

Financing USD

Thank goodness we have almost a year to make this happen.  The University of South Dakota has very reasonable tuition; even for out of state students.  "If you're going to pay out of state tuition pay it to South Dakota,"  is still my mantra.  Paying tuition anywhere is bad enough but there's also room, board, transportation, supplies, and in our case, winter clothes.  (I've been told by several and I believe them; wait until she gets there to buy winter clothes.)  The jury is out when it comes to engine block warmers, snow tires and/or chains.  I'd welcome any advice about those.

Now we're looking to finance this venture.  I know the Pell Grant, work study, and the federal student loan won't cover everything.  Andrea is looking for a better job, We've been making lists of scholarships to apply for, selling candy bars, and set up a You Fund Me account. After she was accepted to USD I changed the color scheme on the site to match USD's CoYOTE colors, red and white. Here is the link to Andrea's GoFundMe page.  http://www.gofundme.com/bsswgc  There is also a banner at the bottom of this page. 

The Universality of South Dakota has some school scholarships as well.  Most are contingent on ACT/SAT scores and whether you applied for admission before a certain date.  I know we made the application deadline, now for the ACT scores.  I had been using Fridays as test prep day; now part of everyday will be devoted to test prep until until ACT test time next month.   

"Admission without test scores?" I hear you asking.  I was surprised too.  Andrea's admissions counselor explained they admit students based on their transcript is their GPA is high enough.  He said they use standardized test scores to determine in school scholarship eligibility for those students and math and English placement for all incoming Freshmen.

Our goal is to get a high enough ACT score for as many in school scholarships as possible.. 

Applying To USD

After our visit to the University of South Dakota Andrea decided that is where she wants to attend college.  She liked Vermillion because she likes small towns.  Despite being small the town was vibrant,and the people were friendly. 

We continued to peruse their website and learn more about South Dakota.  Google became my friend when it came to finding facts not readily findable on their website.  Google found the requirements for admissions for homeschooled students for me.  The only difference was I had to show papers proving homeschooling for each year I homeschooled.  Easy. 

I got all the ducks in a row and told Andrea to apply Early.  They start accepting applications after Junior year.  I wanted t have plenty of time to answer any questions the admissions office may have about her homeschool career.  Andrea mailed the application and we prepared to wait. 

A couple weeks ago Andrea ran downstairs yelling about getting accepted into USD.  I started babbling about not getting a letter.  Our neighbors who were visiting reminded me that everything is done electronically these days.  Andrea said the email stated a letter would be coming.  We all praised Andrea and Andrea and I jumped up an down. 

Tuesday we had an appointment to speak with Andrea's admissions counselor.  We were able to get all our current questions answered.  Everything still looks good and we are still excited.  I think the best pieces of new were she can register for classes over the phone and Freshman Orientation takes place once they move in.  No need to budget for an extra trip for orientation. 

A Great Summer

If wish I could figure out how to have these posts appear in the order of my choosing.  I'll give it another try and hope for the best. 

The last time I wrote Andrea was getting ready to take her road test.  Well, SHE PASSED!!!  She got a 90% on it.  They took of eight points for taking two attempts to back into a spot and only two points for speeding.  She got all her points on parallel parking. 

We learned the Streets And Trips maps were so out of date we didn't dare trust them.  We sprung for a GPS with free up-datable maps and the screen changes when it's time to change highways so you can get a better idea of what's ahead.  Our initial itenary got cut down quite a bit.  We visited ASB, relatives, and USD. 

We'd planned to leave the morning of June 26th after rush hour.  We were just about packed the morning of the 25th.  We kept telling ourselves we wish it was tomorrow and we wish we could leave now.  We decided there was no reason to wait.  Andrea remembered she was waiting for the mailman.  We said if the mailman runs before 3:00 we'll leave today.  The mail came just after noon and by 1:30 we were on the road. 

From a Facebook post. Snippets from our trip. Left a day early and spent extra time with Mom. (Beazle) Visited relatives, friends, and old haunts in Little Rock. Had a blast down memory lane at the ASB Convention. Andrea made friends with my schoolmates kids and she wants to come back next year. Sparkles spend two nights at doggy daycare and enjoyed himself. We fell in love with Vermillion, South Dakota; beautiful little town, clean campus, friendly people everywhere, and Hyvee's muffins are do die for. Did the campus tour and got our Coyote gear. (Pronounced co-YOTE, Yote for short as in "Go Yotes!" Picked up Sparkles at another doggy daycare down not one but two dirt roads. Back to Mom's for a few days. Andrea went to the lake for the fourth and the mosquitos loved her. Went to church at my old ward. We saw more of rural Texas than I ever thought existed on the way to Ennis. Don't know why the GPS didn't send us through Dallas. Got to visit with lots of Edwin's family. The trip back home was long. A full stretch back to Decatur.  Went through Shreveport and saw the worst rush hour traffic we've ever driven through.  Atlanta has nothing on Shreveport when it comes to rush hour traffic.  That was the only time Andrea said she was scared.  

After reading several websites about homeschooling I discovered that homeschool students can earn a high school diploma.  I'll leave it at that so I don't bore you with all the details.  I figured a high school diploma from homeschool is more desirable than a GED.  I spend time coming up with curicula, ordering materials, viewing websites, and making lesson plans.  Andrea worked sporatically at Panera Bread and job junting, sleeping, and hanging out with the neighbor kids.   

On The Road Again

It has been close to ten years since I've been on a long road trip.  Edwin liked to drive so the longer the better.  Andrea says she took after Edwin because she likes to drive.  I hope she feels that way when we get home from the trip were planning. 

Andrea takes her road test on June twentieth.  We'll spend a few days getting the van serviced and getting things squared away around here.  After that, we hit the road. 

Our trip has had many incarnations.  We put everywhere we thought we may want to go into Streets And Trips and then clicked on "Optimize Trip".  Our optimized trip was over five thousand miles lasting over three weeks.  The only thing that concerned us was boarding Sparkles for such a long time.  We'd get a room two nights; the nights before the campus visits in North and South Dakota; if we weren't staying with relatives we plan to sleep in the van in Walmart parking lots.  Hotels in Galveston are too expensive so it came off the list. Next went the University of North Dakota, tuition is up there.  Merritt announced her marriage and Holiday moved to Kansas City, so no go to KC.  Then we learned the ASB Alumni Convention will be later in the year so we can attend.  Add it to the list.  Lechelle wants us to meet up at Myrtle Beach the first part of July. 

Now for fine tuning.  If the ASB thing is the last of June the University of South Dakota (USD) thing can't be the middle of July.  If our trip is optimized I'll miss church in Pine Bluff, something I don't want to do.  Our optimized trip will also put us on the road on the fourth of July, no way.  We decided we want to spend the fourth in Pine Bluff.  To make that happen we head for USD after the ASB thing, then drive to Pine Bluff for the fourth and church.  So I call USD to reschedule our visit.  The person I need to speak with stepped out but the lady gave me her direct number.  I was told to try back in fifteen minutes.  I call back in half an hour and get the voicemail.  No return call yet.  I'll try again tomorrow.  After we've had our fill of Pine Bluff and wishing for even more Irish Maid Do-nuts we'll head for Texas to visit Edwin's family.  I'm going to set andrea on researching things to do while we're there.  Then either head home or to Myrtle Beach depending on dates. 

We plan to take it easy and enjoy the trip.  Andrea asked me to schedule a break every ninety minutes.  That sounds like a lot but if she needs them we won't fall behind schedule.  If she doesn't need them we'll have time to visit some extra places or get a few more pictures.  You know I'm taking my cameras, right? 

We may have to rely on paper maps.  The cigarette lighter doesn't work and I don't know how much it will cost to fix it.  We have no way to keep our electronics charged in the van.  If we don't get it fixed this will be our first lesson on the Life Skills course I'm going to teach next fall. 

I Don't Want to Take My Medicine

My doctor prescribed diuretic pills to go along with my eye drops to try to control the pressure in my eyes.  She said side effects included drowsiness, and frequent urination.  She also said to take them with food or they could upset my stomach.  I made sure they wouldn't make me gain wait, break out, or lose hair.

My friend, Artie told me to start taking a potassium supplement because the diuretic leaches potassium from the body.  I picked up the prescription when I got back from the wedding.  I spent the rest of that week eating a banana a day since I forgot to buy potassium tablets.

I started out bright and early Monday morning taking the pills. To me drowsy means a bit sleepy, like when you stay up later than usual.  I was not drowsy I was verging on narcolepsy.  One minute I'm sitting at the computer watching something on Hulu and the next thing I know, where my forehead meets my hair line is resting on the monitor's screen.  I sit back but am oh so sleepy.  I guess I dose off again because this time my eyes are closed but I don't know where I am.  I decide to take a nap.  I wake up with a headache.  I think I went to bed around 7:00 p.m.

I woke up the next morning feeling exausted.  My body was stiff and achy and that pesky headache was back.  I slept on and off at the computer until I decided to give up and take a nap.  My friend, Lee, calls and I thought I was talking to her for a while until she said she would let me go because my medicine had me sounding groggy or funny.  I don't remember her exact words.  Here I was think I sounded fine after my nap and all.  My plan was to go downstairs but I found myself sitting in the bed several minutes later.  When I do make it downstairs I decide I'm to tired to stay up.  I tell Andrea I'm going to bed.  She informs me that it is only 5:00 o'clock. 

"I can't live like this."  I think to myself.  "Give it a week; you'll adjust and things will get back to normal. You want to preserve the little sight you've got in your left eye.  It's already useless."  I debate with myself most of the morning.  I take my pill vowing to give it a week.  I'm getting wiped out sleepy again.  "I can't live like this." 

I pick up the phone and call the doctor.  Lo and behold I got to speak with her!  I explain the overwhelming sleepiness and headache.  I even explain how I had no diuretic effect.  She said to stop taking them and she'd call in a prescription with half the dosage.  I can't half the pills I've got because they're time released capsules.  The Grady pharmacy takes a few days to fill called in prescriptions so I'll pick it up Monday or Tuesday.  I hope I don't have those side effects on the lesser dose.  I'm feeling better as the medication leaves my system.  Last night I stayed up until 8:30.  It is already after 8:00 and I'm not sleepy.

For some reason my experience caused me to think about people in nursing homes.  There you see people who are just plain out of it and others who don't want to take their medicine.  If I had been in a nursing home could I have convinced a nurse to call my doctor?  When a person in a nursing home doesn't want to take his/her medicine is it because they want to avoid unpleasant side effects they've been unable to communicate to someone who can do something about it?  And the ones who are out of it, just sitting there not tuned it; are they ever alert enough to tell their doctor it's a medication that's causing that state? 

I'm so glad I decided to go ahead and call my doctor.  Hopefully changing the dosage will do the trick.  I guess it all comes down to what you can live with.  When I first started using the eye drops I'd feel dizzy for about ten seconds after I put them in.  Then I was fine until the next time.  After about a week the dizziness lessened in duration and happens infrequently.  I could live with that; it didn't impair my ability to function. 

 

Getting Together

We were all together the weekend of May seventeenth for Merritt's wedding.  I was both good to see everybody again and to have a mini vacation.  We went to Kansas City Missouri for the wedding. 

Andrea and I flew in from Atlanta.  Merritt, Holiday, and Merritt's fiance Gabriel met us at the airport.  Merritt and Gabriel dropped us off at Holiday's while they went to meet Beazle at the hotel where the Collins were staying.  Holiday took us to our hotel, to grab a bite to eat, to Walmart, and on to the stake center. 

Andrea and I spent our time at the Stake Center next door at the Temple.  We were scouting out places to shoot good pictures the next day and getting shots of the grounds. 

After that we go to Merritt's to pick up Beazle and head for Merritt's favorite restaurant, Jazz.  Here I met Gabriel's family for the first time.  We were seated next to the band so we could only really talk when the band took a break. 

the whirlwind continued the next day.  Farmers market, hair dresser/makeup artist, family luncheon.  Constance and Maria arrive in time for that.  Andrea and I go with Beazle, Constance and Maria to get settled into their hotel. 

Maria used OnStar to navigate us to the temple.  The computer says we've reached our destination but we're in the middle of nowhere.  She calls OnStar back and asks for the Stake Center and is given another address but Constance called Holiday or somebody for the address.  Turns out the invitations had the wrong address.  Ggggrrrrrr.

We got there before the newlyweds came out of the temple.  For the next few minutes was a picture taking frenzy.  I went on about that in a Blind as Eye Look blog post. http://blindaseyelook.blogspot.com/2014/05/weddings.html

Now everything starts happening in reverse.  We say goodbye to Beazle, Constance, and Maria after the reception.  Andrea and I slept in Sunday.  Later Andrea went swimming while I watched TV.  We had the bright idea we'd go find something to eat.  I get out my phone and learn there's a subway almost a mile away.  We head out.  When we get there we discover it is closed; so was pizza hut and KFC.  Merritt said downtown is dead on Sundays so nothing is open.  I said downtown is dead in Pine Bluff all the time but Subway is open. 

I hope Holiday isn't planning a wedding anytime soon. I'll need at least two years to recooperate from this wedding and trip. 

Is Spring Here?

It's April tenth and my heat still comes on in the morning.  We've had some warm days put too few for this time of year.  the windows have even been open a few days.  Usually by now the heat is off and the windows are open all the time.  All the rain would say Spring has sprung.

We've got pollen and more pollen.  The van is covered in it.  The sidewalks are yellow with it.  The radio announcer says the pollen count is way above normal.  This is one of those allergic reaction years for me.

First I started sneezing.  I can live with that.  Next my nose stuffed and post nasal drip set in.  I began to feel bad.  As night approached, the worse I felt.  I went to bed around 6:30 two or three nights.  Next came dizziness and I lost my voice.  All I could do was croak.  My friend Tammy thought she had the wrong number when I answered the phone.

Some allergy medicines say not to take if you have glaucoma, others don't.  I wish they'd all use the formulation that would allow me to take them.

Beazle thinks I should go to the doctor.  She tries to send us to the doctor even though she doesn't like to go herself.  I figure it will run it's course with or without seeing a doctor.  

I don't know if it's allergies or a virus.  Andrea says I gave it to her.  

Beazle The Best

I woke up this morning with so much gratitude for Beazle, my mother.  She has done so much for us that we can never repay.  I also know I have fallen short in my accomplishments compared to her.  You can read about her drive and accomplishments on one of the stationary posts on this blog.

Beazle thrived before, during, and after the Civil Rights Movement and she has always had pride.  She was no stranger to hard work.  She didn't make excuses for why something couldn't be done; she just did it.  In retrospect, she made it too easy for us.  I have not and probably will never achieve half as much as she did.

"If I was just twenty years younger there's no telling what I would do," is something Mom said quite often when she was in her late seventies.  I thought of this when I got up this morning.  I am at that twenty years younger age range she was referring to.  I pledged to do a lot more with my life than I have been doing.

First I will stop bemoaning the fact that Getty dumped millions of stock photographs on the internet for free.  They didn't deluge the free market with footage so I should concentrate on that.  Photo opertunities are endless so get out there and shoot.  I can't control Getty or those who will snap up free photos.  I do know buyers will pay for the right image and I need to concentrate on producing varied, quality, photographs and footage.  Beazle didn't give me this gift of everyday photography to let stagnate.

I've adopted the phrase, "What would Beazle do?"  Beazle would be doing; doing something around the house or yard, not wasting time all day.  I'm going to get this house in order, the yard too.  I hate yard work so I need to suck it up until I can earn enough through photos and footage to hire someone to do it.

Now is the time to work on becoming a well-known legally blind photographer.  I don't want to look back when I'm in my late seventies and say, "If I were twenty years younger." 

Not Quite Right

Andrea and I have always been computer people.  We use it for school, entertainment, shopping, banking, you name it.  I've never been big on monitoring because Beazle didn't monitor my sister's or my reading, music, TV shows, or phone calls and we both turned out well.  Unfortunately, now I can make a case for monitoring internet use. 

My youngest Daughter got cought up with someone I would call a predator.  At the end I learned she had deliberately lied to me about several things.  Her behavior had became erratic, defiant, and uncaring.  To me, it seemed as if her reasoning ability had gone out the window. 

According to Andrea she met, I'll call him "X" through a friend.  "X" is reported to have a fairly common name but not so common to arouse suspicion.  He's supposed to live across the country, eighteen years old, and a college freshman.  They would play games online and Skype. 

Shortly thereafter, Andrea starter referring to "X" as her boyfriend.  I didn't pay much attention because she'd had quite a few boyfriends for a couple weeks each.  Her internet relationship stretched into months.  I asked her on numerous occasions how she can call somebody she never met her boyfriend?  I suggested we pay "X" a visit during our road trip this summer.  She didn't want me to meet his family because she said they were prejudiced against Black People.  I told her she had a problem on her hands and that's another reason to meet.  I told her she needed to see if this is something she can live with. 

As time went on Andrea spent more and more time playing games or using Skype with "X".  When I'd tell her to get off the computer or to do something she'd get angry and belligerent.  Andrea's grades started to suffer but we were able to buckle down and get good grades first semester. 

Andrea had a math course she needed to make up second semester.  That gave her two math classes and what a mess?  She was having trouble with the makeup course again.  She said "X" was good in math and could tutor her.  They spent a long time doing the wrong assignments.  That was all our faults because even though the first semester assignments were listed, they did have due dates and one of us three should have noticed.  Andrea was discouraged because she'd done all that work for nothing.  "X" started telling her she should get her GED.

I told Andrea she should keep plugging along.  I told her to work on her other subjects she got behind in trying to learn that math.  I started looking for another tutor because it was clear "X" was trying to learn the material along with Andrea.  The math and school issues are another problem interlaced with this on.  I may deal with it another time.

Andrea let her studies go.  All she was interested in doing was playing games and Skyping with "X".  I questioned Andrea about why he had so much time on his hands.  He wasn't away long enough to even be at school part time or working at all.  She said his parents didn't mind that he spent so much time doing nothing.
Andrea wouldn't do her school work, wouldn't help around the house, had tremendous mood swings, was interested in little other than games and Skype.  She started talking about moving in with "X" after graduation.  In one sentence she'd say she doesn't want to live in a camper/trailer all her life.  I'd tell her if she doesn't want to live in a trailer all her life not to move into a trailer.  The next sentence she's talking about how to make everything fit.

Andrea started telling me what she wasn't going to do.  She wasn't going to go to church, she wan't going to help around the house, etc.  I told her she was going to mind me as long as she was a minor or face some steep consequences.  If she didn't pick up her mess and be in church Sunday morning all she was getting is basic support.  No cell phone cards bought by me, no eating out, no new clothes, no more make up.  Just basic food and pads.  And on December31st she could get up and out of here.  To show how short sighted she is, she didn't go to church that Sunday.  I had already told her she had to got to church until she gets her drivers license in June.  We're talking two months at most.  Conference is one time we don't go and if our ride doesn't go, we don't go. 

Since she was passing only two classes and had no chance of passing the rest this semester, I decided a GED would be her best bet.  For some reason she signed a contract saying she would study the curriculum I lay out toward her GED.  She did well for the most part.  One day some new game came out and she thought she and "X" should spend the day playing it.

I felt something was seriously wrong; something more than my inability to control my daughter.   I placed a FaceBook post asking for prayer.  I didn't go into detail but lots of people said they'd pray.  And it worked!  It worked quickly.  Things started falling into place.  Thank you Heavenly Father.

"X's" FaceBook page was disturbing.  No location, no contact information, no photos at all.  I even have a few.  He only had cartoons and graphics.  Only 37 friends.  What active FaceBook user has only 37 friends?

Yesterday morning started off really well.  Then Andrea said something about waiting until she gets to where "X" lives before she gets her drivers license.  She said that would be easier.  I explained to her that she wouldn't have to retest.  All they'd do is take her Georgia license and give her a license from there.  She blew up all of a sudden and among other things said she wasn't driving, she is flying.  That did it.  Why I don't know.  I decided I was going to put a stop to this if I could.

My incoherent thoughts.  She's going across the country to live with somebody she hasn't met with no means of escape if she needs to.   .

I couldnt get much useful information from Andrea so I Googled him with the information I had.  I found a few entries with the age range I was given so I jotted down the phone numbers and people he may know.  My intent was to call his parents to express my displeasure and to remind them of Andrea's age.  I didn't want to call these random people looking for his parents though.

Next I called my sister, Constance, to see if she still had contact with her lawyer friend who was good at finding people.  Andrea was in the room Skyping with "X".  I decided to speak a bit loudly so they could hear me.  I had been looking up how to report a suspected child predictor.  To my surprise the Department of Homeland Security has a lot to do with investigating suspected child predators. I told Constance about my plans to call his parents if I could find them.  I went on to say if I couldn't find them I was going to contact Homeland Security.  Maybe they could drop by and see if he is really who he says he is.  I don't what made me think or say that but when I did it made sense.  We really didn't know if he was an 18-year-old kid, or who.  I told Constance that way I'd know if I've got a big problem or a gigantic problem. 

Next, Andrea said "X" wants to speak to me.  I said I didn't want to talk to him, I want to speak to his parents so have them call me.  Andrea said to, "Grow a pair and talk to him."  I said I'm not talking to "X", Have him give his parents the landlines number. I was told they were at work.  I just said have them call me tonight or I'm calling Homeland Security.

The phone rings a few minutes later and guess who?  "X".  He says if I don't want him to date my daughter he won't.  He says if I want him to disappear he will because he didn't want to get Homeland Security involved.  He admitted being older than 19 but didn't say how old.  He says he's in the state Andrea said he was.  I told him I thought his disappearing is a good idea if that's what he does but I'm skeptical.  Your relationship isn't right when Andrea is compelled to or feels she needs to lie about your age. 

He had the audacity to ask what made me suspicious.  I told him the obvious one; plans to live with someone she has never met.  I left the rest vague, "Too many things didn't add up." 

I called Constance back to tell her what happened.  She asked how Andrea was taking it.  I said she wasn't mad enough so I've got to keep a close eye on her.  Either She and "X" cooked something up or she's hurt because he didn't even try to fight for her. Constance thinks I should report him anyway.   If if find out he and Andrea are in any kind of contact I will. 

I dialed Star 69 to get the number he called from.  It was a cell phone from yet another state.  Granted, I kept my Arkansas number for years after moving to Georgia, but it could be another red flag. 

I made another FaceBook post asking people what does Homeland Security do other than deal with terrorists and be a pain at the airport.  I got one response and it had nothing to do with investigating suspected child predators.  So if hardly anyone knows Homeland Security deals with this issue, why did it spook "X"?  Yeah.

I decided to give Andrea a couple days to process and think about all this.  Then we'll have a talk. 

Entering the 21st Century

I've wanted a tablet from the first time I saw an iPad.  I thought it would be so great to have all that internet capability with me at all times.  Because iPads were and still so expensive I didn't buy one. 

Tablets by other manufacturers got cheaper and became tempting again.  Kim Komando said not to buy a cheap tablet because they didn't measure up to the iPad and most people would be disappointed.  So I continued to wait. 

The Samsung Galaxy became popular and also got Kim Komando's okay.  My neighbor has one and she likes it a lot.  I was unempressed with her internet speed so I continued to wait. 

Earlier this month Andrea and I went in to Best Buy Mobile in the mall.  They had a really good deal; buy a hot spot for a dollar and get a hundred dollars off certain tablets.  I was excited because the salesman told me I could use Google Voice or a third party app to use the tablet as a cell phone.  That clinched it for me, I could get rid of my cell phone and have a tablet to boot!.  I got the small Samsung Galaxy S3 or whatever it is. 

Andrea started setting it up while we were still shopping.  The hot spot worked great because our internet was fast.  I got the google voicy app put we couldn't get it to work.  I thought I needed to make some changes to my account on my computer or something like that.  I got the MARTA app that has all the bus and train schedules but the best part is it will show where the bus is along its route.  I was really excited about that one.  I had Andrea pull up coupons to show the cashier in JCPenney and Kohls so we could take advantage of discounts we didn't have paper coupons for.  I'm loving this thing and couldn't wait to get home to explore it more on my own.

I found it difficult to use.  Some was due to my sight problems and some was due to the size of the tablet.  I couldn't hold the tablet and magnifyer at the same time it tap the screen wery well.  It was combersome to use.  typing on the touch screen was a challenge for the same reasons.  I thought I could get used to enough of thses things to still make it worthwhile.  Then I discover Google Voice isn't set up for what I wanted to do.  I kept getting a message saying I can't forward to a Google voice number.  So we tried the third party phone apps.  They either didn't ring any phone or the delay was too annoying to deal with.  I was disappointed and decided to return everything. 

I got Andrea to show me her smartpone.  I played around with it and made an unexpected discovery.  The smaller size is better for me than even a small tablet.  I asked her lots of questions about when I needed the phones internet and when I could use WiFi.  I came to the conclusion I could use a cheap smartphone like the Virgin Mobile's Awe to do all my tablet use and have a phone if I wanted to. 

Between Ebates and a Virgin Mobile sale I got the Awe for $42.50.  I got the cheapest card to see how I like everything.  I still have Sprint because neither my billing cycle or minutes cycle is over.  I want to make sure I like the Awe before I cancel Sprint. 

I like the tablet features such as all kinds of apps.  I don't like the touchscreen keyboard but I don't text anyway.  Once I get my contacts in I won't need the keyboard much.  I need to call people and talk on it more.  I'm considering keeping Sprint and using the slow random WiFi when out and home WiFi at home. 

These are the apps I have: my favorite department store and grocery store apps, Domino's Pizza, LDS Library, apps for ringtones and wallpapers, flashlight, MARTA, and Smugmug.  I don't plan to do banking on my phone because I make too many mistakes on the keyboard and there's always the theft issue; but I do have my banks apps just in case, but I'm not logged in.  I didn't get the Facebook app because I waste too much time there already, plus the keyboard issue.  I don't like browsing for apps, too many things that look like games but when I hear about or come across something that sounds interesting I get it. 

Another Kick in the Pants

I posted this on my "Blind as Eye Look" Facebook page.  I think it's worth posting here in case there's a different audience.  

Getty just shop all stock photographers in the foot. they're offering 35 million stock photos online for free. They say because people used to copy and paste them anyway. So they think rewarding them is the answer? They should crack down the way the RIAA did with music a decade ago. I've never contributed to Getty thank goodness. They still have images for sale but they think offering all these free ones will enhance sales. Bull. People will get the free images and look for more. I don't think many will even take a look at the paid once. They say the free images are only for noncommercial use, yet right; if people stole in the past they'll steal in the future, but now with Getty's blessing. http://www.cnn.com/2014/03/06/tech/social-media/getty-free-pictures/

to add to the facebook post I'll give a personal experience.  Once I let Fotolia offer an image in their free section.  I had hundreds of downloads.  Was there an increase in sales of regular portfolio files? No.  Was there and increase in views of regular portfolie files?  The answer again is no>  

Each agency will offer a few free images voluntarily offered by the photographer.  I feel that is enough free material to offer.  We are already competing with everybody and his brother for pictures due to cameras being put on phones and tablets.  I say take your own pictures or pay for them.

A Little But.....

...prescriptions still went up.

I get my medical care and prescriptions through Grady Memorial Hospital.  Grady has a charity division which allows residents of Fulton and DeKalb counties to receive reduced priced medical care and prescriptions.  I've been going to Grady since I was diagnosed with glaucoma in 2011.  The prescription benefit has either been $3 a prescription or full price depending on income.  I ordered from a Canadian pharmacy when my income put me on the full price plan. 

Today, after I got my prescription, I was told, "Beginning April first prescriptions will be five dollars each".  I thanked her for the heads up.  Now I'll pay ten dollars for my eye drops instead of six.  It doesn't sound like a lot of money but it is a 66% increase.

I am glad they didn't skyrocket the way Beazle's medicine did.  She used to get a ninety-day supply of one of her medications for three dollars, according to her.  When she went to refill this particular prescription a couple weeks ago she said they wanted sixty dollars.  I told her it was because of obamacare.  She thinks the pharmacy is just being gready because obamacare is supposed to help people.  Yeah right!  Beazle had her doctor prescribe a different medication and she took it to a different pharmacy.  Now she pays twenty dollars for a ninety-day supply.  Again, it doesn't sound like a lot of money for a ninety-day supply but it's a 700% increase.  That kind of an increase is a lot for a retired person on a fixed income.

Remember Social Security gave a 1.5 cost of living increase this year.     

Bad Dreams

I guess we all have bad dreams occasionally.  Mine take one of three themes; naked in a public place, difficulty moving forward, or I hope this is a dream.  I had the last type last night.  That is what gave me the idea for this post.

Last night I drempt we moved from my home in the suburbs to the projects.  The building was delapidated and the unit was small.  Like in all dreams where I hope it's a dream I asked myself how I got there.  Even though there is no clear answer it feels real.  As usual I hope it's a dream but can't see how it could be.  I am always relieved to wake up and find it had indeed been a dream. 

In some dreams I'm going along just fine until I can't easily go forward.  I may be crossing a street or something is chasing me.  All of a sudden movement slows to a snails pace.  I can crawl or scoot or even move backward if I first turn around in a circle.  The dream resolve itself somehow but I don't wake up.

The naked dream is the most embarrassing.  At the beginning I am inappropriately dressed out in public. I'll be wearing something like a towel or just my bra and under pants.  I tell myself to got to a store and buy a cheap outfit.  When I get near a store I discover I'm naked and the store has moved.

Thank goodness I've never had a dream where I'm naked, can't move very fast, and wonder how I got there wondering if it's just a dream.  That would be a nightmare.  

You've Got to Tell People That?

I find myself asking my self just that quite often these days.  I've been listening to WSB Radio a lot during the ice storm we're having.  I'm surprised when I hear the announcer say, "If you lose power please do not call 911; call your power provider."  I posted this on Facebook and my friend, Ron posted this.

Wanda this just came to me in an email and I have to post it after your post earlier.
Subject: THE "STELLA AWARDS"

*It's time again for the annual 'Stella Awards'! For those unfamiliar with these awards, they are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled hot coffee on herself and successfully sued the McDonald's in New Mexico , where she purchased coffee. You remember, she took the lid off the coffee and put it between her knees while she was driving. Who would ever think one could get burned doing that, right? That's right; these are awards for the most outlandish lawsuits and verdicts in the U.S. You know, the kinds of cases that make you scratch your head. So keep your head scratcher handy. Here are the Stellas for year -- 2012: *

** SEVENTH PLACE * Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas was awarded $80,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The store owners were understandably surprised by the verdict, considering the running toddler was her own son Start scratching!

* SIXTH PLACE * Carl Truman, 19, of Los Angeles , California won $74,000 plus medical expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Truman apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was trying to steal his neighbor's hubcaps. Scratch some more.

* FIFTH PLACE * Terrence Dickson, of Bristol , Pennsylvania , who was leaving a house he had just burglarized by way of the garage. Unfortunately for Dickson, the automatic garage door opener malfunctioned and he could not get the garage door to open. Worse, he couldn't re-enter the house because the door connecting the garage to the house locked when Dickson pulled it shut. Forced to sit for eight, count 'em, EIGHT days and survive on a case of Pepsi and a large bag of dry dog food, he sued the homeowner's insurance company claiming undue mental Anguish. Amazingly, the jury said the insurance company must pay Dickson
$500,000 for his anguish. We should all have this kind of anguish Keep scratching. There are more... Double hand scratching after this one.

 * FOURTH PLACE * Jerry Williams, of Little Rock, Arkansas, garnered 4th Place in the Stella's when he was awarded $14,500 plus medical expenses after being bitten on the butt by his next door neighbor's beagle - even though the beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard. Williams did not get as much as he asked for because the jury believed the beagle might have been provoked at the time of the butt bite because Williams had climbed over the fence into the yard and repeatedly shot the dog with a pellet gun. Pick a new spot to scratch, you're getting a bald spot..*

** THIRD PLACE * Amber Carson of Lancaster, Pennsylvania because a jury ordered a Philadelphia restaurant to pay her $113,500 after she slipped on a spilled soft drink and broke her tailbone. The reason the soft drink was on the floor: Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument. Only two more so ease up on the scratching...

*SECOND PLACE*Kara Walton, of Claymont , Delaware sued the owner of a night club in a nearby city because she fell from the bathroom window to the floor, knocking out her two front teeth. Even though Ms. Walton was trying to sneak through the ladies room window to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge, the jury said the night club had to pay her $12,000....oh, yeah, plus dental expenses. Go figure. Ok. Here we go!!

*** FIRST PLACE * *
*This year's runaway First Place Stella Award winner was: Mrs. Merv Grazinski, of Oklahoma City , Oklahoma , who purchased new 32-foot Winnebago motor home. On her first trip home, from an OU football game, having driven on to the freeway, she set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the driver's seat to go to the back of the Winnebago to make herself a sandwich. Not surprisingly, the motor home left the freeway, crashed and overturned. Also not surprisingly, Mrs. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not putting in the owner's manual that she couldn't actually leave the driver's seat while the cruise control was set. The Oklahoma jury awarded her, are you sitting down? $1,750,000 PLUS a new motor home.
Winnebago actually changed their manuals as a result of this suit, just in case Mrs. Grazinski has any relatives who might also buy a motor home.*